


Love Is the Feeling of Cold Iron Tracks on Your Face as You Wait for the Train to Come

by ObsidionWingsofMidnight



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, And I mean slow, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Omega Kakashi, Slow Burn, So here we are, agonizingly slow updates, alpha gai, also cuz all i write is the angst apparently lmao, anyone who's read a lot of those knows the general gist of what the plot will be like, as an ace that's just too much for me to handle hahaha, at some point, but chances are i won't leave it alone for that long, but yeah don't panic unless it's been like...a year, cuz i'm a sap so you can count on that, cuz that's just what you have to do when you write young kakashi ok, don't expect smut i'm not into writing that sorry, i couldn't help it tho, i mean come on you read the alpha/beta/omega dynamics tag already, i really like kakagai so losing interest seems v unlikely to happen lol, i swear i'll let you know if i lose interest, i swear there will be some moments of fluff, i told myself i wasn't going to start a new fic but here i am, i'll try real hard, i'm not that complicated lol, it sure as fuck will be implied tho, kakashi is a sad angstlord, like a dumbass, like minimum 30 thousand words lol, listen once a month is like....fast for me, none of that they get together in under 5000 words nonsense, so don't panic if i don't update for like 6 months, starting a new fic to add to the hordes that i'm already working on, starts when they're younger and progresses to older ages, that ain't slow hun, the need to write kakagai was too strong, then you can start worrying, uhhhh i hate summaries but i'll do my best lol, unlikely, when i say slow burn i fucking mean it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-05-13 06:39:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14743841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObsidionWingsofMidnight/pseuds/ObsidionWingsofMidnight
Summary: For Gai, loving Kakashi was as easy as breathing. Most of the time it was a simple process that he never had to think about. Sometimes it got hard enough that it made his chest hurt. But most of all it felt like he wouldn't be able to live without it.





	1. Presenting

Gai didn't know when exactly it was that he fell in love. He didn't know when it was that determination to get his rival to acknowledge him became determination to win his heart instead. Perhaps they'd been the same all along.

For Gai, loving Kakashi was as easy as breathing. Most of the time it was a simple process that he never had to think about. Sometimes it got hard enough that it made his chest hurt. But most of all it felt like he wouldn't be able to live without it.

Ebisu and Genma both expressed their disbelief at such a notion and proceeded to tell him how unhealthy thinking that way was, but they didn't understand. It wasn't that he thought he would die without Kakashi or anything as morbid as that. To him it was something that drove him to do better than his best so he could compete on the same level as Kakashi. It was something that made him want to return home from difficult missions. He never told them that last part- how could he?

It was true nonetheless. His father's noble death had left him without a family to return to, and it occasionally made it difficult to _want_ to return home. Everyone always said that home was where the heart is, but losing his father made it feel like his heart had been ripped straight from his chest.

He never told anyone that though because he didn't want to worry them. Really, he was alright. He still had his friends, and that was enough for him usually. But sometimes when it felt like it wasn't enough, he had to find something else to return to. What he always found was Kakashi.

He would be able to live on if Kakashi died; it would be difficult, and he would mourn for him, but he would heal over time. He was sure his love for his rival would never falter- not even if death separated them.

He was not so sure Kakashi would live on without him. His body may persist, but his soul? Gai was not so certain that part would survive.

Even now he saw how Kakashi suffered. Everyone else brushed off his concerns, saying that Kakashi was simply a cold person that didn't care, but Gai knew that wasn't true. Kakashi did care under that steely exterior. He was just better at hiding his emotions than most people. And most people didn't bother trying to find them. In fact, there were probably only three people who did.

Gai strongly suspected that Sakumo's suicide had severely impaired Kakashi's abilities to connect to others. When his rival's father had been alive the boy had been.... less than social, but that seemed to come from a lack of people he felt he could compete with. When Sakumo had died he became much harsher, actively pushing others away so they'd leave him alone.

Then Obito died, and Kakashi was struck with the loss of another he'd cared for. He would never have admitted such a thing when Obito was alive, but Gai knew he cared about his teammates. Kakashi wouldn't visit the memorial stone every day if he didn't care.

And now he had lost another of the precious few people who cared for him.

Worse yet, he believed it was his own fault.

Gai would never blame him for such a thing, but the rest of the village had no such qualms. Even grown men and women were whispering it behind his back everywhere he went.

_Friend-Killer Kakashi_ they called him.

Even Gai's teammates said it, although they tried to respect Gai's wishes by not doing so when he was around. It made his blood boil to know so many people were willing to vilify his friend so easily. If he were a lesser person he would find whoever had started that malicious nickname and crush their skull between his hands.

Kakashi did not deserve the cruel treatment he got. And in Gai's opinion, the world did not deserve someone as wonderful as Kakashi.

"Come now, Gai! You must see reason- Kakashi is a ruthless killer, and there's no changing that!" Ebisu blustered, pushing his sunglasses up his nose. He and Genma had taken it upon themselves to talk Gai out of visiting Kakashi anymore. Ludicrous thinking in Gai's opinion.

He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and standing straight to tower over his shorter teammate. "I will do no such thing! Nothing you say will dissuade me from seeing my rival today, tomorrow, or any day after!" he proclaimed.

Genma scratched his nose and calmly replied, "Not even if we told you he was presenting and that the Hokage shut him in his apartment so no one would bother him?"

There was a brief moment where Gai processed what Genma said before he finally understood what was happening.

"WHAT?!" he shouted with enough force to make Ebisu stumble back a few feet. Genma had been prepared for such an outcome and covered his ears, but he still made a face at the boisterous cry.

This was a momentous day indeed! Gai remembered presenting as an alpha himself, and while he did not envy his rival for the week ahead of him he was excited for what would come afterword. With their newly heightened senses they could embark on even more enthralling challenges! He could challenge him to contest where they found out who could eat the hottest curry! Or challenge each other to discover whose sense of smell was better!

"I must go to his apartment at once to congratulate him then!" he declared.

Genma winced at his friend's vigor and grabbed his arm before he could take off. "Yeah, I don't think that's such a good idea. And not just because of the whole 'Kakashi's a cold hearted bastard' thing."

Gai twisted around to frown at him. "Nonsense! I can't not congratulate my rival on becoming the alpha everyone's been expecting for years. This is a milestone in his life that I must acknowledge! Fear not though- I have the decency not to disturb him during such a time. I merely wish to stand outside his building and shout my congratulations to his window."

"......As tempting as that sounds, I think that would still disturb him."

Gai opened his mouth to refute such a claim, but Genma held a hand up to cut him off. "Also, I hate to tell you this, but your esteemed rival isn't 'becoming the alpha everyone's expected for years' like you say."

"Indeed!" Ebisu cut in, "Rumor has it that Kakashi is in heat!"

The day appeared to be full of surprises. He finally stopped trying to escape his teammates and turned fully to look at them in shock.

"Right. So you can see why letting you go in all your alpha glory to shout at him through his window would be a bad idea," Genma said, looking searchingly at him. Gai would have replied, but he wasn't sure he would be able to get any words out of his mouth for some time. It felt like his jaw was about to fall off from where he'd let it drop at the information.

"Look on the bright side, Gai! Now you are bound to surpass him since you are of the superior gender and therefore biologically ensured to do better!" Ebisu said.

That snapped him out of his stupor.

"Ebisu, my dear friend! Don't be ridiculous! My rival's presentation changes nothing! You know as well as anyone that the idea of omegas being the weakest secondary gender is nothing but a misperception! If anything, Kakashi's presentation will only further the abolishment of such notions as I'm sure he will continue to surpass everyone's expectations!" he declared, striking a youthful pose.

Genma pushed away a stuttering Ebisu to address Gai again. "Ebisu's sexism aside, I just want to make sure you're not going to do anything stupid like visit Kakashi right now. How about we all go train together instead, okay?" he offered.

Gai couldn't say no to that, especially when he knew visiting Kakashi at the moment was a bad idea.

"Very well! I'm grateful that my teammates wish to embark with me on a youthful journey to better ourselves!" he cried.

He could visit Kakashi when his heat was over. No harm in that.

* * *

Kakashi was miserable.

He ached everywhere, he was dehydrated, and he still felt too flushed, even though his heat had passed yesterday. Fuck this. Heats were the worst, and nothing was going to change his mind on that.

Too bad for him since he now knew that he'd be experiencing this for the rest of his life. He was going to have to go through this once a month for a whole year until the doctor's were sure that nothing bad would happen if he started taking suppressants. That was the minimum wait period before they allowed you to start taking them after presenting. Something about "not damaging the goods" before they were fully developed. Ridiculous. It wasn't like Kakashi was ever going to have kids anyways.

Then, barring any unforeseen complications, he'd finally be allowed to cut back to once every three months. That was the recommended amount of mandatory heats for omegas to go through. If Kakashi was lucky he'd convince Minato to let him do it once every four months. He doubted he'd get away with any more than that.

Being an omega already sucked, and he was only thirteen. Only a lifetime left to go he supposed.

He'd been prepared for the possibility but deep down he had still been hoping he'd present as an alpha. Hell, even a beta would be better than this. He knew how sexist society was towards omegas, even in the ninja community.

His fellow shinobi were already sneering at him for Rin's death, and now this? They were going to treat him like he was nothing more than the dirt they walked on.

At least Minato and Kushina wouldn't treat him any differently.

Everyone else though.... Well, he supposed it didn't matter anyways. As long as he got the job done they wouldn't be able to run him out. Their opinions weren't worth anything anyways. He already knew they would hate him no matter what. Who wouldn't after all that he'd done?

Memories of boisterous laughter rang through his head. He scowled and brushed them aside.

What did it matter what Gai thought?

_Everything_ , a traitorous voice whispered in the back of his mind. He curled in tighter on himself and tried to ignore it.

In all honesty Gai probably didn't care about Kakashi's presentation, but just the possibility of Gai's disappointed face at finding out he wasn't an alpha was enough to make his stomach churn. He didn't want Gai to look at him like he was a failure just for being an omega.

Disappointing Gai should have made him happy. After all, wasn't that what he'd been trying to do after all these years? Discourage Gai enough so that he'd finally leave him alone?

He told himself that it was, that it would be better that way, but he knew that deep down he never really wanted Gai to leave him. Sometimes Gai felt like the only constant thing in his life- like the only person that wouldn't abandon him.

That may have seemed unfair to Minato, but Kakashi couldn't well depend on his former teacher to always be there for him. He was Hokage now- he had important duties that couldn't be pushed aside for some bratty kid. Plus he had a wife now. Kakashi couldn't compete with either of those things, so he was resigned to taking a back burner in his teacher's life.

His father, Obito, Rin... They were all gone now.

In a way he was almost grateful for his heat. It was the first thing to truly distract him from Rin's death. Without his presentation he would have kept wallowing in his grief, but with it he was forced to forget about it.

The nightmares returned as soon as his clarity did however, so it was a short lived relief. He could still see her blood on his hands when he closed his eyes, felt the way her organs gave as his hand crashed through her body. How thankful she looked in the end for killing her. He'd spent countless nights scrubbing frantically at his hands to try and rid them of her blood, but no matter what he did it always lingered.

He didn't blame the villagers for their distrust. He wouldn't have trusted him either after everything that went down. Friend-Killer Kakashi. It was a fitting name. It would drive people away from him which was an added bonus. He didn't deserve to have friends. Those were meant for _nice_ people like Rin and Obito. For people like Gai.

He sighed, shaking the thought away. There was no point in thinking about it. After all, it's not like Gai was going to be waiting up for him or anything. If he knew about Kakashi's condition he probably still thought he was in heat, so it was unlikely that he'd see him today.

Besides, Kakashi had more important things to take care of. He was pretty damn hungry for one thing, and after a week of ration bars he was getting pretty damn sick of them.

Unfortunately, he didn't have anything else at home right now, so that meant he had shopping to do.

Figures.

He checked one last time to make sure he looked acceptable before opening his door and immediately tripping over an outstretched leg, landing in someone's arms. Which was entirely unexpected and very strange.

"Rival! I wasn't expecting you to come out today!" a voice boomed right above his head, making him flinch.

Oh for fuck's sake.

He glared up at the smiling face and did his best to look menacing despite how tired he was. Gai however, was not off put at all by his expression. "Apologies for tripping you! I did not expect you to walk through the door while I stretched my legs!"

Kakashi did not like what was happening. First, he stumbled as soon as he set foot outside his apartment, then he ended up having Gai catch him, and _now_ he had to deal with all these new sensations that came with presenting. Namely the smell. Gai smelled _really_ good. There was absolutely nothing good that could come from this knowledge.

"Gai, what the hell are you doing here?" he blurted out to distract himself. He was definitely not going to keep thinking about how heavenly the other shinobi smelled. No sir, that was a terrible idea.

Gai peered down at him undeterred. "I came to congratulate you on your presentation! Now that we've both reached such an important chapter of our lives we can embark on a new set of challenges that our heightened senses allow us!"

Kakashi almost sputtered at that, but he held it back at the very last moment. "Challenges?"

"Yes! Rival, I challenge you to a battle to find out who can eat the spiciest ramen!" the spandex clad chunin bellowed. Kakashi should have known it would be something like that.

"You won that even before either of us presented, so there's no point," Kakashi deadpanned.

Gai's bright smile dimmed at that while he hummed in thought.

Belatedly, Kakashi realized he had yet to remove himself from the other's embrace and hastily shoved him away to stand up. He shot Gai another scornful look as he turned and started to walk down the hall.

"Rival, where are you going? Have you thought of a new challenge for us?"

"There are no challenges, I'm just getting something to eat," he snapped. Maybe if he walked a little faster Gai would leave him alone. The thought alone was so preposterous he resisted the urge to face palm.

Gai would have caught up to him even if he ran at full speed at this point. He was too exhausted to get rid of him, and the feat would have been difficult when he was in full health anyway. He would just have to put up with the noisy teen for the time being.

"Ah, I see!" Gai said, striking a thoughtful pose. "Not that I don't admire your tenacity, Rival, but are you certain you ought to be out and about right now? Forgive me for saying, but you look rather tired. Are you sure you'd rather not rest at home for another day?"

Kakashi's pace quickened ever so slightly. "Quite sure. I need to get groceries and I'm sick of ration bars," he grit out. He was almost at the building's exit.

A hand on his shoulder made him pause. "Kakashi." Oh, not good. Gai only used his actual name when he was being serious. Also that low tone should not have made him shiver.

He turned slowly to look at the other with his good eye.

"Allow me to get the supplies you need. You need rest, and I cannot stand idly by and let you run yourself into the ground."

Kakashi opened his mouth to tell him to mind his own damn business but stopped. He was exhausted....and he knew Gai was offering without any strings attached.... He shouldn't.... He didn't want to encourage Gai into thinking that they were friends....but just once couldn't hurt, could it?

"....fine," he replied. shoulders sagging as he let Gai lead him back to his apartment.

It was just one time. It didn't have to mean anything. It's not like it was going to become a recurring experience. Right?

Wrong. He was very, very wrong. Something he would find out in the years to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome to the angst party, leave your expectations at the door
> 
> So I'm placing them at 13 for the start of this fic because it didn't say on the wiki what age Kakashi was when Rin died, just that it was soon after Obito's death- and he was 12 then, and then when the kyuubi attack happens he's about 14, so I figured I'd just shove him at the age in between lol. It's a good age for puberty anyways.  
> They probably won't stay that young for very long. Like maybe two more chapters at most of them being in early teens. I'm more interested in when they're older.


	2. Eternal Rivals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> to the tune of Shots: ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST EVERYBODY~!

It became common place over the first year of Kakashi’s heats that Gai would show up outside his door before it ended so that he could herd Kakashi back into his apartment when he inevitably tried to leave before it was over. They may have been young, but Gai knew that most omegas would never dare to leave their safe haven before their heat was over unless they had no other choice, shinobi included. Kakashi seemed to be the exception.  

Without fail, at least one day before his heat was actually finished, he would try to venture out of his apartment. And without fail, Gai was always there to stop him.  

The first time had of course been unintentional. He had merely gone to congratulate his rival for presenting and come face to face unexpectedly. The second time had been out of concern when he remembered his rival trying to leave the first time. And when that proved to be a prudent choice, he decided to continue the practice for every single one of his rival’s heats. At least the ones he was in town for. It couldn’t be helped if he were sent away on a mission, but so far that hadn’t happened. Every now and then, Gai would wonder about the convenience of that. Perhaps the Hokage knew about the development and was trying to watch out for Kakashi in his own subtle way?  

It was possible. The Hokage was a busy man, but Gai knew he still cared about his last living student. There was no way a man that caring could possibly stop being concerned about his pupil’s wellbeing, especially when the only other two he’d ever had were lost to this world.  

Whatever the case was, Gai was grateful for the convenience. Without it, he was one hundred percent certain that no one else would ever bother to come check in on Kakashi. And that certainly wouldn’t do.  

Kakashi’s unpopularity was a bit of a sore spot for Gai, particularly since he also knew what it was like to be shunned by conventional society. Honestly though, his own social standing didn’t matter much to him, but Kakashi’s was just baffling. The silver haired shinobi was a prodigy! He was more talented than anyone else in their class, and he worked harder than anyone else too. Plus, Kakashi was very attractive, even despite the mask that obscured most of his face. He heard people whisper about it all the time. Really, he ought to have been very popular.  

The only thing that kept people back was his cold personality.  

Although Gai wished Kakashi had more friends, he was proud to say that he had managed to get Kakashi to open up more with him than with anyone else. These past months checking in on his friend further proved that.  

Kakashi was still rather taciturn for the most part, but he was a little more willing to accept Gai’s challenges nowadays. He even deigned to train with him every once in a while! The first time he agreed to train with him Gai had nearly shouted his joy from the rooftops. In fact, the only reason he hadn’t was because Kakashi told him he’d take it back if he so much as stepped foot on the rooftiles.  

More interesting than these every day happenings however, was the way that Kakashi behaved when he was coming out of heat. Now, Gai would never  _ever_ take advantage of his rival in such a sensitive state- and he would gladly fight off anyone who would dare try- but it was intriguing to see Kakashi be so…. vulnerable.  

No one else in the village could even imagine the word vulnerable being used to describe his rival, but that was all Gai could think of when it came down to it.  

Right now, for example.  

Kakashi had opened his apartment door a full day and a half before he was scheduled to come out (based off of Gai’s calculations anyways), and without acknowledging him with a hello or how-do-you-do, promptly fell asleep on his shoulder. Sure, Kakashi had let himself be herded back into his apartment for the last five months, but this was a whole new level of trust between the two of them.  

Gai had moved to catch the smaller male and keep him upright on instinct. He stood there cluelessly for about a minute before shaking his surprise off and scooping him up in his arms to carry him back to his room.  

It was hardly the first time that Gai had been in there, but it was the first time that he was in there to tuck him into bed instead of waking him up. All the other times he’d simply pushed Kakashi into his room, shut the door, and then cooked him a meal. And when that was all said and done he’d go wake him from his nap and then insist on the omega eating whatever he made.  

Carrying his unconscious rival to bed was entirely new territory, but he couldn’t say he disliked it. It was incredibly flattering that the other was comfortable enough to sleep in his presence without prompting. Sleeping on missions didn’t count because it was required if he wanted to be in top shape. That was a professional trust, and this one was a personal trust. If Gai wasn’t careful he was going to get a big head from this new development.  

There was a brief moment where Gai hesitated to put Kakashi down, but only because it was so nice to be holding him like this. His rival’s head was lying on his shoulder, soft silver hair tickling his chin, and snoozing peacefully. He was so cute it made his insides melt.  

However, he didn’t think Kakashi would appreciate it if he woke up in Gai’s arms. Falling asleep in them when he was exhausted was one thing, but remaining in such a position when he could be easily moved? He would surely be glared at for that.  

Carefully, moving with the utmost caution so as not to disturb his friend, he creeped into Kakashi’s bedroom and set him gently on the bed. Then he tucked him in for good measure because that’s what friends do. Besides, there was still a chance that Kakashi’s body temperature would drop too low and make him sick. When going through heats, omegas’ body temperatures would fluctuate between feverishly high and dangerously low. Many people mistakenly thought that the high temperatures were the only thing to worry about- what with them being called “heats” and all- but actually the cold tended to come immediately after a spike in temperature, so it was important to keep thick blankets around that the omega could nest in when they cooled down. 

He had read extensively on the subject of heats when it became apparent that the knowledge would be exceptionally useful for dealing with his friend. It was the end of his cycle, so it was less likely that such an extreme would occur, but Gai liked to err on the side of caution.  

He was pleased to note that his rival’s sheets and blankets were all freshly washed because he would have hated if they weren’t. Then again, they were always freshly cleaned whenever Gai checked in at such a delicate time. He imagined they’d both find it somewhat embarrassing if the evidence of Kakashi’s, um,  _other_  symptoms were left around. Really, the only thing that gave any sign that his rival was in heat and not just exhausted was the smell. There wasn’t much he could do about that- opening a window and letting the smell travel elsewhere would only invite trouble. Far too dangerous for such a vulnerable time.  

While it may have made it a tad more difficult to concentrate, Gai didn’t mind the smell at all. There was that all too primitive voice in the back of his head that inhaled the unmistakable aroma of an omega in heat and told him to go claim his rival before someone else did, but he was very good at ignoring it. If anything, it was just another challenge to overcome.  

Kakashi’s scent was quite comforting to Gai. He was just so used to being around the other shinobi that it made sense he’d be used to his scent. Kakashi smelled like the air after it rained, with a cool note of mint mixed in, and just a hint of smoke. He smelled like home to Gai.  

Genma pointed out that whenever Kakashi was away on a longer mission or whenever Gai hadn’t seen him in a while, the alpha had a habit of chewing on mint leaves. That made him blush at the realization he had such an obvious nervous tick, but it was nothing compared to how red in the face an enraged Ebisu was. He was still having a hell of a time trying to convince Gai that his relationship with Kakashi was fruitless and unhealthy. Genma had taken to quietly judging from the sideline and teasing him gently for the most part, but Ebisu was still hellbent on changing his mind.  

Ah well, he’d come around eventually.  

In the meantime, Gai was going to continue with the routine he and his rival had established.  

* * *

“You can’t let Kakashi join Anbu!” he exclaimed, slamming his hands on the Hokage’s desk with enough force that it nearly knocked the man’s mug of tea over. The blonde omega kept it steady with one hand and signaled to his Anbu guards to stand down with the other.  

He gave the teen a patient smile. “Gai, I’m glad you’re concerned about Kakashi’s wellbeing, but I assure you that I’m doing this for him. I know the village doesn’t view him in a kind light, but you and I have both noticed the toll Rin and Obito’s deaths have taken on him,” he said, smile turning sad at the mention of his former pupils. “Anbu will give him purpose, as well as distract him from his pain. At least, I’m hoping it will.” 

“Anbu is too dark for him right now! My rival should be finding ways to explore the joys of life- not throwing himself into the darkest shadows the world has to offer! If you let him do this he’s only going to hide his pain deeper and drive everyone further away,” he tried to reason with Minato.  

“I’m sorry, Gai, but the decision has been made. Kakashi has already accepted his new position.” 

Gai would have fought more on the matter, but it was clear that Minato wouldn’t change his mind. And perhaps more importantly, there was no way Kakashi would change his mind about joining Anbu either.  

* * *

He wished he could say that his fears were unfounded and that Kakashi healed from his trauma while in Anbu, but that would be a lie. Oh, Kakashi thrived in Anbu, that was for certain, but it was only because he was so ruthless that his enemies never stood a chance.  

There was a coldness growing in his rival that worried Gai. Genma told him it was just Kakashi turning back to his usual self, the way he’d been before Obito’s death, but he was wrong. This time was different. Back then Kakashi had shut other out when he lost his father, not wanting to let anyone get too close for fear of losing them. Even back then he still retained his heart, still held on to his humanity. Now it seemed like he was actively pushing it away, burying it so far beneath the surface it would suffocate.  

He was away on missions so often that Gai hardly ever got to see him. He’d chewed on so much mint in the past months that Ebisu and Genma had bought a small plot in the community garden just so they could specifically grow it for him.  

Every once in a while, Kakashi would return, and if their time in the village overlapped they’d spend it together. Sometimes for challenges, and sometimes just to hang out. Both of which Gai found extremely pleasing. And of course, there was also Kakashi’s mandatory heats that Gai was now certain the Hokage coordinated his missions around so that the omega wouldn’t have to be alone when they ended.  

So, it wasn’t great, but it also could have been far worse he supposed.  

Then the unthinkable happened.  

* * *

Gai sped back to the village as fast as his feet would carry him. His team leader had only huffed good naturedly at his growing fidgeting the closer they got to Konoha until he eventually told Gai they would debrief with the Third Hokage in the morning, so he could run ahead if he wanted to. He’d barely waited for the last words to come out of his teacher’s mouth before rushing off with a loud call of gratitude, eager to return home.  

The Nine-Tails’ attack and the subsequent death of the Fourth Hokage had left the village reeling. Fortunately for everyone, the Third Hokage stepped up to claim his old position and lead them through reconstruction.  

Unfortunately for Gai, the Third Hokage didn’t prioritize Kakashi’s well-being the way Minato had, so the young alpha was sent out on a mission right before Kakashi’s heat started. He had done his utmost best to finish the mission as soon as possible, but even with his best efforts he returned one day after his friend’s heat was scheduled to end.  

He could only imagine how lonely Kakashi must have been in his absence. Sure, he was only missing a day or two that they would normally be in each other’s presence, but it was an important time nonetheless!  

He knew his team mates thought he was being ridiculous and wasting his affections, but Gai knew that even if Kakashi didn’t return his feelings that the omega still appreciated having him around. He knew Kakashi still appreciated having at least one friend left in this world.  

The sun had long since set, but he couldn’t bear to wait any longer to see his friend again.  

When Kakashi’s apartment proved to be empty he wracked his brains for where he would find him instead, or at least he tried to before catching a trace of the other’s scent and decided to follow that instead.  

The trail led him away from the village, making Gai increasingly worried- Kakashi really shouldn’t be this far from his apartment in his condition- until he found himself at the edge of the lake next to a pile of his friend’s clothes.  

It was harder to see in the dark, but the moon was nearly full, and the light from it illuminated his friend’s silver hair. He was curled up on a small outcrop of rocks, staring silently at the still waters of the lake.  

Gai stripped off his outer layers and dove right into the cold water, not hesitating for a second, swimming swiftly to his rival. 

He only slowed his approach when he got close enough to Kakashi to get a good look at him. Like Gai, he was only in his undergarments, black fabric clinging to his skin, and his telltale mask plastered against his face. The alpha wondered if it made it harder to breathe. Kakashi was holding so still it was as if he wasn’t breathing at all. His hitai-ate was off though, revealing the long scar over Kakashi’s closed left eye. There were noticeable bags beneath his eyes that made Gai want to scoop him up and insist he get some rest, but he held back. Even in this state, he wasn’t sure Kakashi would go willingly. So much had changed since he joined Anbu.  

Despite his cautious attitude, he couldn’t help but creep closer anyways. He stopped once he was close enough to touch the rocks Kakashi was perched on, turning his head aside to gaze at the peaceful lake like his friend.  

It was some time before Kakashi spoke. “I thought you were on a mission,” he said so quietly that Gai only heard him because the night was so silent.  

He cleared his throat lightly. “I was.” He chanced a look at Kakashi, but the other was still looking off in the distance. “I just got back. I was hoping to find you back at your apartment,” he added with a just a hint of disapproval. Kakashi knew by now how Gai disapproved of him being out and about so soon after his heat ended.  

“I don’t like being shut away in there,” he replied blankly. “It’s too empty. Too cold. I’d rather be in the open air or around other people. Kushina-” he cut off to swallow past the lump in his throat. “Kushina said it was part of my omega instinct searching for a bond mate. She said Minato-sensei was the same way whenever they were separated for his heats. Guess I’ll just be this way forever then. Not like I’m ever going to bond with someone,” he said, sadness creeping into his voice.  

“You never know,” Gai said carefully. “Someday you might just find yourself proven wrong. I’m sure that someday you’ll find someone who was meant just for you. You mustn't give up so easily my rival!” he said, trying to cheer him up.  

“ _Rival_ ,” Kakashi chuckled bitterly. “It feels like I’m everyone’s rival these days. Always someone to prove my abilities to, always someone I’m upsetting, always someone whispering behind my back. Maybe the whole damn world’s my rival, huh?” He said the words lightly, but Gai could see there was a weight on his shoulders, dragging him down.  

“Kakashi…”  

The omega didn’t give him a chance to continue. “Obito used to call me his rival, you know. He always felt like he had to compete with me to prove that he had worth. The rest of the Uchiha thought he was useless, but I guess they thought I was worth notice, so he got jealous. I guess maybe he thought if he proved he was better than me they’d notice him too. It’s too late now though; they only saw his worth after he died. But then again, neither did I.  

“I always took him for granted. Thought he was stupid and annoying. Cried too much. Cared way too much about his crush on Rin. I didn’t realize how comfortable it was to be annoyed with him though. I guess a little part of me thought it would always be that way. Him calling me his rival and vying for Rin’s affections as he stumbled his way through life.  

“But life didn’t turn out that way, did it? We’re not rivals anymore. What’s to say you and I won’t stop being rivals somewhere down the line?” He finally turned his head so that he could look at Gai with his good eye.  

“That will never happen,” Gai said sternly. He reached out to pull one of Kakashi’s hands from around his legs and take it in his own. He squeezed it in a way he hoped was reassuring. “No matter what life throws at us, I promise you that I will never stop being your rival. And should death ever come to claim me, it will not stop me from challenging you! Even if I leave this world, I will still be your rival! And whenever you and I have both moved on to the afterlife, I shall continue challenging you there. No matter what happens, our rivalry shall be eternal,” he declared proudly.  

Kakashi’s eye softened, tilting his head to look at him. “Eternal rivals, huh?”  

Without another word he slipped down into the water beside Gai, tangling their legs together and wrapping his arms around the alpha’s waist while he rested his head on his shoulder. Gai felt like his heart was going to pound straight out of his chest it was beating so hard.  

“Okay. I can do that,” Kakashi whispered softly into his collarbone.  

They stayed wrapped around each other, unmoving and unspeaking but comfortable, until Gai eventually coaxed his friend into returning home to rest.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, y'all must've known it wasn't gonna be sunshine and daisies 
> 
> btw I'm very flattered by your comments and kudos, and i love you all, but also i cannot for the life of me reply to literally any comment ever cuz i'm just that useless, but just know that i do read each and every one of them and lose all ability to function like a normal human being cuz i'm so flattered. hope i don't let y'all down lmao


	3. Gai and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Mission

He wished he could say that Kakashi turned over a new leaf after that evening in the lake, but that wouldn’t be quite true. There were small changes that showed Kakashi was trying to be a little more open with him. He stopped turning his challenges down all the time. When he was home on missions he’d go out and spar with Gai, or they’d go out to eat, or some other silly challenge. Occasionally, he would even deign to join group activities with the rest of the shinobi in their age range. Granted, he mostly kept to himself, but it was a step up from blatantly refusing to join them at all. 

And of course, there were also the rare occasions when their schedules synced up so that Gai was around to keep him company during the tail end of his heats. 

Genma and Ebisu still couldn’t believe that Gai would spend time with him during such a private period, or that Kakashi was actually going along with it. There was a lot about the relationship that they couldn’t wrap their heads around. Although, in fairness, Gai suspected he and Kakashi were the only ones who could understand it at all, and even then there were plenty of things they simply didn’t bother talking about. 

For example, they never talked about the cuddling- which grew more and more frequent with each passing heat. If it were anyone else, Gai wouldn’t have even bothered to mention it as something unusual, but given his rival’s closed off attitude, it did seem worth noting. Well, noting to himself anyway- he decided to wait for a while before telling his other friends about it, as he wasn’t sure how they would take it. 

Genma might be able to come to terms with it, but Ebisu? He was a whole other story. He wasn’t sure about the other shinobi in their age group either. It was only recently that they’d been interested in initiating contact with Gai- they were finally ready to embrace the springtime of youth! Or so he suspected. 

Still, as pleased as Gai was that the people around him were all starting to flourish in their down time, he couldn’t help but notice that Kakashi was still losing part of himself to Anbu. 

Watching his rival during his time in Anbu was rather how he imagined a pyromaniac felt when they saw a blazing forest fire. There was something about it that was beautiful and deadly, all that power pouring out and removing anything in its path. But the thing about fires is this: they always burn out eventually. Even the greatest ones. And he feared the day he saw Kakashi’s flame go out. 

He wondered sometimes if the reason Kakashi was willing to get close to him now was because he also sensed his fate, and was finding solace in the one last thing he had to cling to. 

Civilians would often keep pets, and when that pet got to a certain point, they would spoil it as much as they could to ease their passing and make their final days as comfortable as possible. Was that what Kakashi was doing?

Youthful and brave as he may be, Gai was still too cowardly to ask if it was so. 

All he could do was hold onto his rival as tight as he could and hope for the best. 

* * *

Sometimes life was decidedly uncool, and Gai had to admit that his current mission fell directly under the category as well. 

It was supposed to be a fairly straightforward job- find and return a boy from a wealthy family who had gotten kidnapped for ransom. Unfortunately, they were given bad intel, and it turned out the boy had been working with his kidnappers all along. Also, what were suspected to be regular old brigands were actually a group of missing-nin, so that didn’t help either. 

All of this was far from ideal, but ultimately not too bad if not for another tiny detail. 

Ebisu had the flu. 

His teammate was on sick leave, so he was being replaced for the mission by none other than Gai’s eternal rival. Ordinarily, that would probably work in their favor. Despite the fact that his team did not have years' worth of experience working with Kakashi in missions, the other shinobi was more than capable of making up for it with skill alone. 

The problem was that during all the chasing and fighting, the whole team had been hit by a barrage of senbon, and each had at least gotten a scratch from them. Again, not too bad, except for the fact that the needles had been coated in something, and said something had only affected Kakashi. Because Kakashi was the only omega on the team. 

He doubted their opponents had known this since Kakashi regularly wore scent blockers on missions, but they must have known it wouldn’t hurt their chances. See, the senbon had been coated in something that triggered Kakashi’s body to go into heat. Hence why the mission was not being youthful or cool at all. 

Gai was crashing through the underbrush of the forest, more concerned about getting away as fast as he could rather than doing so inconspicuously, Kakashi curled around his front. He would be damned if he let any of them set their hands on his rival like this. 

They’d gotten separated from the rest of the team at some point, but he had faith in his mentor and Genma. They could take care of themselves. Honestly, the bigger question was whether or not Gai and Kakashi would be able to stay safe. 

Kakashi was in no state to fight- he could barely stay upright on his own. And Gai had to protect him best as he could, but his greatest asset was his skill in taijutsu, and he couldn’t well battle while holding his rival like this. He’d consider setting Kakashi down to take care of their opponents, but there were enough of them around that he didn’t feel confident enough about letting his friend remotely out of his sight. That left very few options, and the one Gai had chosen to run with- quite literally- was to escape and hide. 

Hardly the most dignified response, but definitely the safest option at the moment. 

Once he thought he’d put enough distance between them and their pursuers, he leapt into the trees, flitting from branch to branch until he found one suitable to conceal themselves with. He sat with his back rested against the tree trunk while Kakashi stayed sprawled across his lap. 

His grip on the other tightened when Kakashi whimpered softly into his neck, his rival’s hands curling into a vicelike grip on his vest. The smell of slick in the air was cloyingly sweet, and Gai did his utmost best to remain unaffected, but it was difficult with his rival grinding into him. Stalwart as his heart was, he was only fifteen.

He tried to placate his friend, shushing him gently and stroking his back in an attempt to calm him down a bit, but he feared his efforts would be in vain. Even with the gap Gai had managed to make between their hiding spot and their opponents, Kakashi’s scent was practically a flashing beacon to their location. His scent blockers had been effectively nullified by the pseudo-heat, so they were no help. 

There was only one thing he could think of that might cancel out all the pheromones Kakashi was sending out, but he was praying that Genma or his mentor would find them before resorting to it. 

Judging by the state of things however, he doubted their teammates would make it there before their enemies. 

Kakashi whined plaintively, and Gai shushed him again, rubbing a hand through his hair and marveling at its softness. If they were in Kakashi’s apartment, he would have taken the time to enjoy the feeling of it sliding through his fingertips, but they were not in his apartment- they were in a tree, hiding from a group of missing-nin. 

Speaking of which, his instincts were telling him that the enemy were fast approaching, so the pair were going to have to move again. 

He reacted too slowly in his hopes for his allies to arrive sooner, as one of the missing-nin came careening out of the branches with a kick that Gai didn’t have time to block properly with his arms full. He had just enough time to let his back take the brunt of the blow, but it stung something fierce, and he was knocked off balance from his perch atop the tree. 

He managed to land on his feet thankfully, albeit with a few stumbling steps. His opponent followed soon after with a near gleeful look on his face. 

“Thought you could get away without a real fight, huh?” he taunted, a nasty leer aimed at the omega in Gai’s arms. “Hoping for some alone time to bond with that bitch, maybe? It’s a wonder you lot let your breeders out to pretend like they’re warriors.”

Gai’s blood boiled at the man’s words, and the brazen way he spoke about his precious rival. How dare he talk as if omegas were any lesser than the other genders, or that Kakashi wasn’t perfectly capable of kicking his ass when he was in his right mind. And how disgusting of him to assume that Gai would ever take advantage of someone like that. It was truly a despicable creature standing before him. 

“I don’t think there’s any reason for us to be speaking when we should be fighting,” Gai replied coldly, setting Kakashi down behind him so that he could assume a proper fighting stance. 

The enemy merely smirked at him. “Oh? Well, if you don’t want to claim him, then maybe I’ll take care of it. Right after I step over your corpse.”

Gai narrowed his eyes. “I’m afraid I can’t allow you to do either of those things. But like I said before- it’s time to trade blows instead of words.” 

He rushed the other man before he could speak again. 

* * *

Killing was a necessity that Gai refused to take pleasure in, but this particular enemy he refused to feel any remorse over. 

He stepped over the body and went to retrieve his temporary teammate. Kakashi was still curled against the tree trunk he’d been left by, panting heavily and sweating profusely through his uniform. He peeled open his good eye to blink at Gai a couple times before closing it again and groaning. They were going to have to hurry if they didn’t want Kakashi to overheat and make his condition even worse. 

He picked his comrade up again, and the omega proceeded to drape himself over him like an overgrown koala once more before they took off. 

It was lucky that Gai knew the surrounding area well enough to locate the river nearby. It wasn’t a particularly wide river, about fifteen feet across, but it was deep enough to submerge them about mid-torso, which was what Gai needed right then. 

The cold water shocked a gasp out of his rival, who clung to him tighter for a moment before relief from his burning skin washed over him. The river would wash away their scent for the moment as well, which was the other reason Gai had chosen to come here, but he knew that it wouldn’t last long if Kakashi kept sending out pheromones the way he had been. 

Kakashi wouldn’t be able to help it though, unless he found a very different kind of relief that would stop his biology from broadcasting to everyone with a functioning nose that he was in need. This was the larger problem that Gai was currently battling against. 

They couldn’t stay in the river because the enemy would be able to track them there, but leaving the river would also mean Kakashi’s scent would grow stronger again. The best course of action would be for them to leave the river, but to let Kakashi…. find his release before then. It was certainly not an ideal situation, and not for the first time, Gai found himself cursing Ebisu’s poor health for indirectly leading them to this situation. 

Again, he would never take advantage of his rival in such a vulnerable state, but their survival was sort of dependent on it at the moment. There was only one way that Gai could think of that he might be able to get away with it, without it being overly sexual. It was still rather intimate though, and he wasn’t sure how Kakashi would take it once his pseudo-heat had passed. 

Gai had read a lot of books about omega biology, but most people with common sense already knew that omega’s necks were very sensitive. It was after all, crucial to creating a bond between a mated pair by having the alpha (or beta) bite the omega on their neck while they mated. 

Now, he wasn’t a hundred percent positive, but he was fairly certain that if he bit Kakashi on the neck right now it would be enough to take care of the situation. And since they were absolutely not mating right now in the middle of the river, it wouldn’t actually cause a bond to form, so that wouldn’t be a problem. It was really the most reasonable solution to the problem at hand, although it made Gai’s stomach twist with worry. He was sort of hoping that Kakashi wouldn’t remember anything about this mission. 

Time waits for no man though, and Gai had wasted enough time already. With one hand he carefully peeled up the edge of Kakashi’s mask where it ended at his neck- thank god he wasn’t wearing one of the ones that was attached to his shirt- and revealed the pale skin beneath it. 

“Forgive me for this, Kakashi,” he whispered before sinking his teeth into a spot just below the other’s ear. 

Kakashi seized up in his arms with a gasp before slumping boneless against him, unconscious. 

Gai did his best to ignore what had just happened in favor of getting out of the water and finding a new place to hide out until the missing-nin were taken care of. 

* * *

It wasn’t long after that when another missing-nin found the pair, and he made to defend themselves once more before a kunai in the stranger’s throat stopped him. 

“That should be the last of them,” Genma said, popping up on an adjacent branch. He gave the two of them a lingering once over, and raised an eyebrow pointedly at the way Kakashi was passed out blissfully against him. Gai felt his face heat up, but there was little he could say that would get his teammate to stop looking at him like that. 

Fortunately, their mentor showed up right then, dangling their target by his collar and looking somewhat put off by the whole ordeal. The group in the treetops leapt down to join him on the ground.

“Let me go! You ruined everything! We were going to have the money, and then Yuki and I were going to bond and be together forever! But you killed him, and everyone else! I’d rather die than go back with you lot!” the boy screamed. He looked about their age, and Gai secretly wondered if this was a normal mindset for wealthy civilians. 

“Well, if you’re that eager to die then I bet Hatake would be more than willing to help you out once he wakes up,” Gemna replied nonchalantly, scratching his nose. “He’s pretty famous for his ruthless style,” he added just to watch the boy go white faced. 

Choza Akamichi sighed at his student’s antics but let him have his fun. The mission had been a total pain in the ass, and all for an ungrateful brat that didn’t realize he was being used. When they left for this mission a couple days ago, he’d expected it to be a walk in the park. A simple knock out of some amateurs, a grateful kid, and a good team at his side. 

Really, he appreciated Ebisu, but he hadn’t been too upset about Hatake joining them in his stead. After all, the kid was a prodigy, regardless of the cold attitude he was famous for. 

Although, seeing him on mission with Gai at his side made Choza reconsider all the rumors he’d heard about the White Fang’s son. Gai had always been adamant about Hatake’s good character, but the rest of his team had always refuted it in turn, so it was interesting to be able to make his own observations on the matter. 

Hatake hadn’t been overly friendly, but he hadn’t been outright cold either. If anything, he acted like any other ninja that preferred to stick to professionalism. And despite his reputation in Anbu, he had no issue following orders or working with a team he’d never been with before. Fairly standard stuff, if you asked him. 

More interesting to Choza was watching Gai bounce around him like he hung the stars in the sky. Hatake remained more or less impassive, but he didn’t rebuff Gai’s touches or challenges unless he felt like they would get in the way of their mission. Even then, it was more a gentle reminder that he gave, and Gai would simply laugh at his own overexcitement and propose something else that wouldn’t get in the way of work. 

Now here they were, Hatake in heat but peacefully sleeping in Gai’s arms instead of in extreme distress. 

He had to admit, he’d been a little worried when the two of them had disappeared right after Hatake’s heat had set in. Not because Gai would do anything uncouth, but rather because Gai might not think straight enough to keep them safe. It hadn’t surprised him in the slightest when Kakashi’s movements had stuttered and Gai immediately picked him up and ran when the situation became apparent. 

He’d be annoyed about Gai abandoning the mission, but he couldn’t blame him in the end. Besides, it all worked out eventually anyway. 

Still, the rich brat could stop squirming so much and quit screeching about how they’d wronged him. 

“Sheesh, you and Hatake might both be omegas, but you couldn’t be more different than night and day,” Genma said aptly, smacking a leg that had flailed a little close to his face. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you could learn a thing or two from him. Namely, some common sense.”

Choza rolled his eyes and told them all it was time to return to Konoha. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been a looooot longer than i realized since i last updated. not on purpose tho! I was really busy this semester. fuck college lmao. but! i finally bring you another chapter! after like five months lol. sorry about that. 
> 
> boy, kakashi has a rough fucking life cuz i just make things so difficult for him. he's not gonna be happy when he snaps out of it. and poor gai remains as gentlemanly as ever, although guilt ridden for things that were out of his control. also ebisu's gonna go nuts when he hears what happened lol


End file.
